Living with Traumatic Brain Injury

I was deployed to South Baghdad. I was involved in mulitple Ieds upwards around 15. I have multiple closed head injuries. The second bomb blast I was in damaged my hearing and left me with ringing in my ears, headaches, motion sickness, and I noticed that I could no longer remember orders and things of that nature.

I was a gunner on a humvee and the blast only ripped the antenna off of the humvee but I could feel it go through me like 100s of needles going through my body. I could not walk straight after the blast. Doctors said I had post concussive blast syndrome. Well I encountered more and more blasts the worse these symptoms got. The last blast knocked me out of the humvee and knocked me out. Ripped my 240 bravo machine gun from its mount and jammed it.

I seldom leave the house now because I might not remeber how to get home. I cant remember my dogs name sometimes. I cant remember reletives friends names. The Army could not treat my TBI because I could not deal with being around people. They had to send me home on convelesnt leave. The smallest thing upsets me now and I start to shake and at times become dangerous to myself and others. My speech is not good anymore and I cant remember how to express myself.

Sometimes I see and talk to people that aint there or so my wife says. My wife will be talking to me and Ill answer her and she will look at me and say honey I didnt say anything. Sometimes I see people shooting at me as we drive down the road and my wife says it is not happening though I think my wife is lying to me and the government has her under there control because they hypnotized her. I see my first seargent lying in my floor bleeding trying to steal my 3 purple hearts. Life has become so confuseing. I could go on but I guess you get the idea of the new world that I live in. How I wish I could go back to the person that I once was.