Living with Multiple Sclerosis

It was in 2002 and I was 27 years old women, when I woke up one day and my life had changed. On this particular day I woke up to feel as though I was drunk. When I stepped out of my bed, onto the floor, I started stumbling and staggering around. It took me about a half an hour or so to get my balance and I felt very tired. That day I just decided that I must be run down and I need to start eating and sleeping better. Then with in that week, I started feeling this jumping and tingeing sensation under the skin on the top part of my right thigh. I just thought to myself that’s weird and went on about my day. This whole time I was still not feeling quite myself.

The next several weeks more symptoms came up that I just couldn’t ignore. I was driving down the road and my friend was in the car, when she said to me “why is your head shaking,” I said I don’t know. I could feel it happening but I didn’t want to say anything to her, for fear that I was just going crazy. Then another time I was driving and everything around me became blurry, I just stopped the car and my husband got out and scooted me over to the passengers seat, so he could drive.

When the cold weather came I had such severe pain down my spine. At times when I was cooking or just holding something in my hand, I would drop it, because I would get these cramps in my hand kind of like the ones people get in their feet. I made and appointment to see my family doctor. He ran a cbc, tested my thyroid, checked for EBV/ Mono, checked for Lupus, Lyme disease pretty much everything. So then we just played the wait and see game, thinking maybe I had some weird virus.

As time went on I started having problems concentrating. Such as; I was once a very good speller and then one day it took so much time and effort for me to remember how to spell some of the most simplest of words. I would sit and talk to my friends and family and forget what I was saying or couldn’t think of the next word I was suppose to use, right in the middle of the conversation. I would also have a hard time finding the right words to use and putting thoughts into words. I would sometimes have conversations with people and I would truly believe that I never said or had that conversation. This was very frustrating since I worked from home at the time, as legal assistant for an Attorney and done so for three and half years. This made it almost impossible to communicate with others. I am sure some people just thought I was loosing it.

Then I started having these spasms in my right arm and sometimes around my throat. Which made feel like someone, was pulling rubber bands around my arm and throat, really tight. These problems went on for months before, I finally went to see the first Neurologist. He didn’t do anything but a neurological exam and poke me with these pins to see if I could feel them. He said, that my balance was not steady and that there were several places that I didn’t feel the pins. Then he proceeded to tell me that maybe I was depressed. I am not trying to be rude, but why was he so quick to jump to this conclusion. Yes, I may have been getting a little depressed, but it wasn’t until all of these things started happening, which caused me to be a little depressed. Frankly, I don’t know who wouldn’t be if they were fine one and not the next. So, I never saw him again.

My family doctor, ordered an MRI without contrast and sent me to see a Neurologist at Barrow Neurological Institute. The conclusion on my MRI was brain with in normal limits, minimal inflammatory disease, right ethmoid air cells. After the doctor looked at the MRI and examined me he said, I don’t believe that you have MS right now. He then said, I think you had a virus that attacked your brain and everything will hopefully return to normal for you. Then he proceeded to say that I have a 10% chance of getting MS and because of everything going on with me, I should have an MRI done once a year to see if I have any lesions.

So, I went home spent the whole weekend in my bed crying my eyes out, because I felt hopeless. Then I decided I will deal with this on my own and start my own physical therapy I did start exercising at home and I used muscle relaxers for the spasms, and those are a couple of things I did to help get some relief. I started doing word searches and crossword puzzles to try and help with my concentration and memory problems. It did help out a bit.

I have been doing a lot better since 2005, the episodes or what ever they are come back, but I just try and work through them and rest more when needed. I never went back for another MRI Maybe I will one day, I’m not sure. It is just too emotional to have someone say I am not sure what is wrong with you.